When Fred and I started this second adoption, we opened it wide to all the options, including doing Foster-to-Adopt care here in the U.S.  The ONLY reasons we decided not to were 1) it might be too much loss for the twins to absorb, having children pass in and out of our home after they’ve already lost their birth and foster moms, and 2) because we don’t want to adopt out of birth order, there’s not as much of a need for us here.  We didn’t feel right potentially bumping a childless couple out of line so that we could parent #’s 3 and 4 for our family.

However, did you know that you can SEE who needs a home here in the U.S.? Read the rest of this entry

Many times, while we’re in our first adoption process, parents-to-be get caught up in the details of the paperwork and forget that the adoption placement is not the end but rather the beginning of the adoption journey.  The recent story – currently all over the news – about the Hansen family from Shelbyville, TN, who sent their adopted son back to Russia because they couldn’t handle him any longer, points to a lack of wide-spread knowledge about the ramifications of adoption, its potential effects on the children, and where to turn for help.

We in the U.S. have become so accepting of adoption as “a good thing” and “normal” that it seems like we (and maybe those in other highly-developed countries) have forgotten a foundational truth: Children available for adoption are only available BECAUSE something has gone wrong.  Read the rest of this entry

What is a dossier?

An adoption dossier is the set of documents required by a foreign country in order to be considered to adopt there.  Not ever country requires one, but most do. 

U. S. domestic adoptions do not require a dossier.

Submitting your dossier is the first official step in that country.  Usually, you have to submit some portion of the country fee (the amount of money that country collects from prospective adoptive parents in order to process an adoption) with your dossier.

Submitting a dossier does not guarantee that you will adopt a child.  Each country has the right to decline a family’s file.

  Read the rest of this entry

Short Answer:  If you mean your placement agency, no.  Your homestudy agency, however, must be licensed in the state in which you reside.

Longer Answer and Explanation:

An adoption placement agency is the agency that will match you with a child you’ve said you would accept for adoption.  Ideally, that agency is looking to place children needing families with the best family matches for them and not the other way around, but that’s a topic for another post.  Your placement agency can be anywhere in the country of which you are a citizen.

If you enroll in an international adoption program, your placement agency should have reputable contacts in that country to facilitate the legal process there.  Always check on an agency and what you can find out about their reputation in-country before signing with them! Read the rest of this entry

If you’re working with a good adoption agency, they’ll have up-to-the-minute information on what each country wants to see from your dossier.  But in case you ever want to double-check what you’re hearing, check with the U.S. Department of State. 

The requirements your agency gives you should at least cover everything listed here. 

Also useful for checking the status of currently-”closed” countries (we keep an eye on Guatemala, ourselves, since our twins were born there).

I get this question a lot.  People have a vague idea that “adoption is expensive,” and the unknown dollar figure dissuades some from looking into it before they even talk to an agency.

So here it is - how much our adoptions have and will cost, and I also hit up a friend for the cost of her domestic adoption, since ours are both international.  But one quick item before I continue: even if you know someone well enough to ask him or her their answer to this question, please, please, please watch your words and never ask “so how much did they [the kids] cost?”  The process costs money; the children are priceless.

Needed to mention that since I’m not the only one I know who has gotten that “off” question – by people who meant no harm, but really…

That said: Read the rest of this entry